• SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 days ago

    Considering this is a meme, I’m not sure which non-real numbers you’re referring to. Here are some real numbers about why you should let a doctor jam a camera up your ass.

    It the United States, the lifetime frequency of colon cancer is 1 in 25 (4%) for men and 1 in 26 (3.8%) in women[1](https://www.cancer.org/cancer/types/colon-rectal-cancer/about/key-statistics.html). Frequencies are similar for most Western European countries. It’s one of the most common cancers, being third in the US and second in western Europe as an aggregate [1](https://www.cancer.org/cancer/types/colon-rectal-cancer/about/key-statistics.html), [2](https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11905646/) In the US, colon cancer frequency is increasing amongst those under 55 by 3% each year and is the leading cause of cancer-related death in that group[3](https://www.cancerresearch.org/blog/colorectal-cancer-awareness-month).

    It’s highly preventable. The majority of colon cancers begin as slow-growing polyps which are easily detected and removed. Doctors snip them off while in there. Easy as that.

    If you do skip screening and get colon cancer, it’s fucking terrible to deal with, as are all cancers of the GI tract. If gone undetected, it will have slowly proliferated throughout your colon. You’ll experience bouts of severe cramping, constipation, and painful, uncontrollable, bloody diarrhea that prompt you to see a doctor. The affected length of colon will then be surgically removed. If you’re lucky, they’ll reattach what’s left to your anus. If not, they’ll route it out through a hole in your abdomen, called a stoma. Either way, you now have diarrhea for life, possibly in a bag you have to tape to your stomach and periodically empty, and you’ll have to shit much more frequently since your body can no longer effectively remove the water from your feces.

    You’ll likely need chemotherapy, which will make you sick and miserable throughout its course as it often severely affects the gastrointestinal system. You’ll spend a lot of time in the bathroom, vomiting and emptying the even more rapidly filling shit bag on your stomach. At that point, you’d give anything to go back in time and let a doctor probe your asshole. If you’re lucky, you go into remission but will require increased screening for the rest of your life in case it returns. If you’re unlucky, you’ll die painfully, shitting and vomiting on your way to the grave.