i have been powering through a basic level book and a stupid, low stakes manga to start reading but its not at all relaxing to me. to me its an Activity. my only actual method of rest is scrolling on the phone. hobby doesnt relax me just another thing to do. right now my hands itch for insta reels (im on my laptop). i badly want to read more but i just cannot. it exhausts me. other than scrolling, my only other ”rest” is listening to music and cleaning around. everything else is Activity that requires Energy. i cant relate to people who read to relax. i feel intellectually inferior and i try to power through because i know its good for you. sometimes i consider just accepting that i am what i am (certified Intellectually Disabled) and just giving up. just be a stupid simpleton, nothing else just consume consume consume, scream when im hungry and do nothing. i wish i could forget how to read and speak all together.
Hobbies/relaxation and rest are not necessarily the same thing. Taking long walks or running can be de-stressing and a hobby but are also very tiring. And eating 10g of cannabis and melting into the couch can feel like resting but also be very unfulfilling.
If it’s not good why do you want it? Reading books for leisure won’t make anybody better than other people. If you’re not feeling compelled to keep reading you don’t have to.
That’s not to say your relation to infinite scrolling is not worrying. It has the typical signs of an addiction, including sucking the pleasure out of other activities.