I want to not wake up to an alarm.

I want to sip coffee on my porch while I watch woodland creatures.

I want to plow a field and drink barley water.

I want to tramp around a bog looking for wild edibles while my dog flushes game.

I want to wander in the woods after a snowfall, with the Milky Way above me and it’s so quiet I can hear the owls fly by.

I want the fireflies to be all the light I need.

I want an email to never find me.

That’s what I want for Christmas.

I mean, at least he won’t ve practicing medicine anymore

Social media was alright back when the algorithm was “show the newest posts first.”

Once it started sorting things by engagement it created an incentive to be inflammatory and controversial.

4chan is a great early example of this because things only stayed there if they got additional posts, rewarding controversy.

All uncovered glasses of water belong to the cat.

I thought this was common knowledge.

(Real talk: I almost lost my half-feral asshole because he wasn’t drinking enough water. Make sure all your animals have plenty.)

Do you trea their dishes like human dishes, replacing them with every meal? Do you have more than one bowl for them?

Undermind - Phish

All of computing beyond programming with switches is “protecting the user from themselves.”

“Why use a language? Aren’t you able to perfectly program in binary? I’m not going to waste time building something just because you’re stupid.”

Remote into my other machine and play video games

Lay in my hammock and talk to the birds and squirrels.

Heaven is a Chuck Tingle book

You could make good money teaching people how to do a proper interview.

Things were never the same after CNN made the news ticker permanent on 9/11/01

Cronkite, too.

I hear this all the time and it bears repeating that Independent doesn’t mean centrist, unless you lump anarchists in with the Dems.

vichy pigs

Your mom sounds cool

Yes but also yes

I do not doubt the French people, only the French police who are clearly running away in this situation.

ACAB

Imagine a toilet so far from anyone that no matter what you do to it you will be the only witness.

Now don’t move there because I called it.

Some grad student is going to get access to a wind tunnel for this meme

I’ll take the downvotes. This would have killed in _|1996~ the late second millenium

I mean, they are French police.

Surrender is in their nature. Hell, some of their helmets are white