The one guy just walks around all day carrying a big-ass rock everywhere he goes? I think he could probably take the other two in a fight, then

Sheesh, should’ve known better than to try and make a joke around here, I guess. I appreciated it, at least. I’ve got a soft spot for suddenly making really dire, grim statements in otherwise totally pedestrian conversations

It genuinely boggles that so many people would take “the evil night-horrors” as an actual argument for this

Yeah, man. That oughta change their mind.

…Dracula AND his son?

Look, I respect your right to be how you are, but keep it in your church. I don’t need to see it everywhere I go, and I damn sure don’t want it anywhere near me. I don’t have a problem with you, but if you try any of that God shit on me, I’m gonna put you on your ass, bro.