Afatwa, or religious decree, issued by senior Iranian clerics calling for the assassination of U.S. President Donald Trump has attracted online funding worth tens of millions of dollars, reports say.
That’s it. We found the most 21st century thing ever:
A GoFundMe for a political assassination.
I saw a billboard (in California) for a gofundme for Texas disaster relief. That feels peak 2025 to me.
Scams all the way down.
And those people have been trained to hate California(ns).
I think Maher is right when it come to how people in shithole states are taught to hate California, when the reality is that they are jealous of Cali.
That’s probably at least partly right, but the most smugly arrogant American that isn’t the Mango Mussolini himself is perhaps not the best messenger for a “they hate me 'cause they ain’t me” message 😄
I doubt most of the teabaggers would listen to anything that counters their emotional beliefs. And yeah, Maher comes across as smug - but he’s not at all wrong…I mean, it’s probably even more true these days since California is the 4th largest economy now.
The people always bitching about Cali (but most likely have never been) have real “I hate the prom queen and prom king, they are so stuck up!” energy.
And you know what, I desperately want my (tax) money to go to supporting them in their disaster.
Things will get wild once someone invents a decentralized assassination market.
Plot twist their CIA version is thinking about a coup… or just as simple a bribe…
I seem to recall reading one of the divisive things the cipherpunks on their mailing list discussion was about untraceable digital money (before Bitcoin) and the thought experiment about just this very kind of thing (minus the siren server like GoFundMe, because why would you want that in the mix if you were doing this kind of thing).
Not that anyone set it up, and the many proposals around digital cash did not really gain traction until 2009 or so…but this was from the 90s.
link? :p
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Kinda figured it would be removed. Which is kind of funny since it’s mentioned right there in the article.
I was curious what it would be like. Looks like a pretty normal fundraiser site. Probably wasn’t worth getting put on another NSA list tho
You mean to tell me that you’re not using a private dns server or at least a vpn?
Just raw-dogging that ethernet, eh?
It just feels better, okay?
I wonder how many VPNs are compromised, TBH.
Here’s a breakdown of major VPN companies, who owns who and what, and who’s independent and who isn’t.
…yeah, according to a vpn company
I get that, I get that, but their data does check out.
Where do I donate?
Did you know that it’s illegal to say, “I wish someone would kill the president of the united states”?
Im not saying it, im just letting you know that it’s illegal. Like a public service announcement.
“Fun” fact. Trevor “Fell from his Balcony” and died shortly after this video.
What a weird coincidence.
Edit: Apparently it was a decade later. I was confused.
12 years later is “shortly after”?
No. I was just confused. The first time I saw this was a few months before he died and I guess I didn’t realize it was from years earlier. My bad.
For some reason I thought this was a Matt Walsh bit. Wkuk and ucb occupy a similar area of my brain.
They are pretty similar in a lot of ways. Like how Matt Walsh walks around with a gallon of meth on most days, and he probably has kids tied to his radiator in his basement so he can grape them. Just uncanny really.
I got so many questions I’m not sure I want the answers to.
Two all time classics, although I feel like you missed cat hunting
🤦
Edit to add;I never claimed to be terribly bright.
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That’s another good one. Lol
Will no one rid us of this turbulent president?
But I thought murica was the pinnacle of free speech? 😮
Okay but what about investing in the Fatwa ETF?
You can, however, wish bad fortune and ill luck befall the president. Its the “I want a person to do a thing” problem because it sounds like you could looking for somebody to hire.
“Freedom of speech” mfs when it’s not about literal speech.
When I see a cheeto on the floor, there is always a demon voice in my head telling me to stomp it with my foot
In the US.
Most countries wouldn’t care at all.
Unless it’s part of a piece of art
Did you know that it’s illegal to say, “I wish someone would kill the president of the united states”?
Nope: can’t know things that aren’t true.
It’s not a true threat. When someone said
If they ever make me carry a rifle the first man I want to get in my sights is L.B.J.
that, too, was rejected as a true threat. The Secret Service may pay you a visit, though.
So, when are you not killing the president?
Okay, but where are the diagrams?
interestingly, $35 millions came from a single donation in $MELANIA memecoins
Your comment made me actually open the article. Sadly your comment seems to be fake. I want to believe!!
The comment is real. I see it too.
It’s right there!damn, it actually is! 🤣
What are the stretch goals? I mean, we have a whole slew of shitbags the world would be better off without.
“The above sum ($40,286, 867) will be received by the people who have committed themselves to any freedman who will carry out the sentence of justice.”
($45,286, 867)
“A photo of the deceased will be published.”
($50,286, 867)
“A recording of their last words will be published.”
($60,286, 867)
“Ol’ Pete will get the Russian resignation treatment.”
($65,286, 867)
“Marco will get a special tea to drink.”
Is Rupert Murdoch still alive?
He’s the new Kissinger. Death has been trying to claw machine him since that SSS Kissinger pull.
“Only the good die young”
I believe so, unfortunately.
Where can I donate?
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Why article 5? Is it not only valid if a country suffers an unprovoked attack? It will be hard to argue that bombing a country is not a provocation.
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Article 5 and Catch 22, which in this case would be formulated as, “They can do anything that we can’t stop them from doing.” One could make that argument, but who’d be listening?
You can get thrown in a concentration camp because your skin’s too dark and you weren’t carrying your ID, even if you’re a US citizen.
That’s one of the side effects about tossing out the rule of law. If merely protesting or having a certain meme on your phone is dangerous, then might as well go all in.
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Funding a foreign assassination attempt will only unite all of the right-of-center and take away some of support of “centrist”/“conservative” democrats.
If it’s done in full seriousness, sure. But, the left can play the same game the right does. “Haha, it’s a joke, I just donated $10 to the kill Trump GoFundMe, isn’t that hilarious! What’s wrong, MAGA? Triggered? What snowflakes! Relax, it isn’t real, it’s just a joke. OR IS IT!? Haha, only joking, you thought I was serious. You MAGAs just can’t take a joke!”
If Trump were assassinated, I would celebrate, and donate to the assassin’s defense fund. I don’t care if MAGA Nazis consider me a terrorist. Fuck them and their treasonous, corrupt ignorance.
As he lived for creating chaos, his own death would make him happy. The man who destroyed civilization has a certain ring, doesn’t it?
Perhaps move to Iran first, then you can really appreciate the greatness of that society and their great struggle against evil.
A temporary alliance in a common goal is fine. Whatever Iran is doing it doesn’t deserve the Israel/US bombing and war crimes.
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Has there ever been an assassination that was motivated by a public bounty? And did the assassin successfully collect?
I’m not asking whether there have been any previous similar bounties—I’m asking whether any of them were the primary incentive for a successful assassination.
The attempt against Rushdie failed, and the attacker claims to have had religious rather than financial motivations (and doesn’t seem to have planned to escape to collect payment in any case).
If they got away with it, we won’t have heard about it.
That’s why I’m specifically wondering about the public aspect of the bounty—it presupposes that the assassin will be publicly known and able to conduct financial transactions afterward, and that the sponsor will be able to openly make good on their promise.
One way they could do it:
- assassin writes down their plan, including time, place, method, and payment address
- assassin hashes plan, then time-stamps and publishes the hash
- assassination takes place
- assassin publishes plantext plan and link to hash, proving beforehand knowledge
- sponsor pays assassin without even having to know who it is
The sponsor would have to be able to publicly demonstrate that the assassin was paid, though—otherwise they could claim to have paid the bounty while keeping the money, and the assassin couldn‘t protest without exposing their identity.
But they could publish another hash.
Since the payment address has been published, anyone can verify whether or not it’s received any payments.
i kinda wanna read his book now
rush die
The problem is that Trump isn’t actually in charge. He’s just the figurehead who holds everyone’s attention.
You’d have to remove half the supreme court, Congress, the electoral college, and the entire Heritage Foundation if you wanted a chance at fixing the US.
Trump on his own is a bumbling toddler who couldn’t even make his own executive order to sign. I’d rather see him in a nursing home while the people who put him in power get tried for their crimes.
Yes, but since all the bumbling toddlers in the US vote for Trump, he’s a powerful figurehead. I mean, I’m all for killing the rest on your list too, but he’d be a fantastic start.
Starting with Dump would give us President Vance, who could mess things up faster
Also more likely to cause a martyr situation starting with him
imo anything that makes this shit hit rock bottom more quickly so america can rebuild as a non-nazi nation is a good move
The problem is, rock bottom has two paths out. The first is to rebuild as a non-nazi nation. The other is to go full Nazi and just stay at rock bottom for a few decades.
I don’t think reality is that simple
I realize theyre now all in office now, so you may be right. But did anyone notice how the bumbling idiot orange puppet was a critical part of gaining that power?
He is certainly a puppet, but maybe without that puppet, it’ll be like trying to play He-Man when the kid next door took your He-Man figure.
He was just a useful TV star puppet.
He is crucial to their movement though. Most MAGA don’t give a shit about anyone else. This is a cult and without dear leader it will wither.
If Iran were to turn Trump into a glob of orange meat (I mean, more than he is right now), the cult will freak out. Some will blame it on deep state. Clinton and Biden will be name dropped. But there will be nothing to keep the movement going. I think Project 2025 will start to wither as well because no one involved can capture the mob like Trump can.
Only to have Democrats fail to undo a single thing Trump did, just like in 2021. No matter how he dies, Trump and MAGA will haunt the USA for however long it has left before the inevitable collapse.
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No doubt the cult would fracture
It won’t end with Trump. His followers are brainwashed and will happily follow the next con man like sheep, just as they follow corrupt religious leaders. Not a critical thought in their heads. And anyone but a Dem.
Swap the prisoners in Gitmo for the Heritage Foundation
So the plot of Eagle Eye and Designated Survivor.
You’d have to remove half the supreme court
Make that two thirds of the Supreme Court. Most of the worst decisions have been 6-3.
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I upvoted, but only to raise awareness of this important issue. /s
I don’t think making him a martyr would be a good idea. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t shed a tear if he passed with the worst agony I can imagine. But making him a martyr would make his agenda immortal.
Martyrs tend to be symbols to a cause. Trump and maga don’t have much ideology it’s more a cult of personality. Those tend to go away when the central figure dies.
I understand what you mean. But think of Hitler. Obviously his agenda did not die with him. But imagine all the numbnuts if he was assasinated on the peak of his power.
And to be fair, the easiest way to tell someone doesnt belong in society is when they start spouting hitlers views. A little litmus test, as a treat
thats exactly what he did. He killed himself before he could get captured because videos of him in detention and beaten senseless would diminish his legacy. Your example is prove of the other guy being right
Also, Hitler didn’t invent racism or antisemitism. His agenda didn’t die with him not because he was such a powerful figure, but because he was harnessing prejudices that have existed before apes even started to walk upright.
Why didn’t that happen with Bobby Kennedy and his aspirations for social justice?
I’m unconvinced they can find a replacement for him that touches the nerve of all those hateful loons at once. Who are they going to have? JD Vance and his eyeliner?
The next election they’d play the “Do it for Him” card, but I can’t see them queuing round the block to vote for anyone else. They voted for Donald because even in their politically sheltered lives, they’d heard of him and seen him on TV. As somebody who watched Boris Johnson rise to power, it really is as fucking dumb as that.
Worst take in the thread. Martyr or not his philosophy and his followers is “unbridled self interest” aka “fuck you, I got mine.” Martyrdom is antethetical to the cause.
Somebody offing him would set a good example that being a corrupt, fascist leader is not a good way to get riches or a long healthy life.
Am I saying anyone should do something? No.
I disagree. The people who want to make him a Martyr will make him a Martyr no matter what. The people who know what he has done will understand that him being killed doesn’t make any of that better.
See the way all the other Fascists in the world before him were handled.
I don’t think you are wrong. But I think an assassination would be the icing on the idiot cake.
He needs to take the adolf way out.
Nah, it needs to be supremely conspiracy proof. Too many people will believe it was assassination of it could have possibly been assassination.
He’s an old unhealthy man, albeit with the best possible health care. His passing is moderately likely in an average day from health issues.
He also completely seems the type to leave a come-to-jesus meeting with his doctor about how he absolutely has to change his diet and start exercising and still hit the McDonald’s drive thru on the way home, so with a little luck, the best possible medical care won’t matter nearly as much as it could.
No doubt, but a cardiac event will have the best possible imaginable intervention. Might not be enough, but if anyone can pull through on the back of medical capability, it’s him
Further I think Trump is now the least of our problems with the Trump administration. I fear JD would be even worse.
During the Biden term, the worst people built plans around a trump return to office and the relatively more strong execution this time versus last time is from those around him, not himself so much.
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Just do it
The Nike ad campaign I could get behind
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Curb your Enthusiasm did a whole season about this. Should be relatively straightforward for him to get them to call it off as long as he follows their blueprint.
I’m picturing Taco dressing up as “Buck Dancer” and arguing over hotel staff about the proper handling of baked goods and whether they are “freshly baked” by the in-house chef, or just Pepperidge Farm products.
🤣
this is how I knew what a fatwa is
If some Iranians want to hunt down and put an end to some vile child molester’s wretched existence, who am I to stand in their way?
